Making and Receiving Concessions

The Science of Concessions

Every negotiation involves some movement from opening positions toward agreement. How you manage that movement — the size, speed, and pattern of your concessions — significantly affects both the final outcome and the other side's satisfaction.

Key research findings:

• Decreasing concessions work best. If your first move is $100, your second should be smaller (say $50), and your third smaller still ($25). This signals you're approaching your limit.
• Reciprocity is powerful. When you concede, the other side feels pressure to concede back. But if you concede without getting anything in return, you're just losing ground.
• Speed matters. Conceding too quickly signals you have more room. Conceding too slowly risks deadlock. The sweet spot: make concessions after genuine discussion, not immediately.
• Label your concessions. Don't just move your number — explain what you're giving up and why. 'I'm willing to reduce my price by 10%, but that means we'd need to extend the timeline by two weeks.' This makes your concession feel costly and meaningful.

Trading, Not Giving

The most important concession principle: never give something without getting something back. This isn't about being stingy — it's about establishing that this is a two-way exchange.

Instead of:

• 'Okay, I can lower the price.' ❌

Try:

• 'I can lower the price if we extend the contract to 12 months.' ✅
• 'I'm willing to include free shipping if we increase the minimum order quantity.' ✅
• 'I can be flexible on the deadline if you give me final approval on the design.' ✅

This pattern — 'I can do X if you do Y' — is the fundamental building block of integrative negotiation. It turns zero-sum haggling into value creation because you're trading things that cost you less for things that matter more.

Worked Example: A Concession Sequence

You're selling a used car listed at $12,000. Your true walkaway is $9,500. A buyer opens at $8,000. Here is how a disciplined pattern — decreasing, labeled, and traded — unfolds:

Three things make this work. First, each concession is smaller than the last ($800 → $400 → $200 → $100), signaling you're nearing your floor. Second, every move is traded for something — paperwork, speed, certainty — never given away. Third, the final $100 move is labeled as your limit. The buyer, who opened at $8,000, lands near $10,500 — well above the naive $10,000 midpoint they'd have reached by 'splitting the difference.'

How to Receive Concessions

When the other side concedes, your response shapes what happens next:

1. Acknowledge it. 'I appreciate you moving on that — it shows good faith.' This reinforces their behavior.
2. Don't immediately ask for more. Saying 'great, now what about...' punishes their concession and makes them less likely to concede again.
3. Reciprocate proportionally. Match their movement with something of roughly equal value. This builds momentum.
4. Keep track. Mentally note each concession from both sides. If you've made three concessions and they've made one, it's time to say 'I've moved on price, timeline, and scope — I need to see some movement on your side.'

The goal is a concession rhythm — a back-and-forth pattern where both sides gradually move toward an agreement that works.